I stayed away as long as I could. But the allure was inevitable. TikTok is under my skin and I find myself spending loads of time scrolling through the marvellous content on the app, writes Gasant Abarder.
Abarder, who recently launched his book, Hack with a Grenade, is among the country’s most influential media voices. Catch his weekly column here, exclusive to Cape {town} Etc.
I’ve been spending a lot less time on my favourite poison, Twitter, as a result. Truth be told, it wasn’t even Elon Musk’s threat of taking away my prized blue tick that indicates my verified status and dishing them out to anyone who is prepared to pay $8 a month.
(Look, they have been handing them out to randoms. Even Carl Niehaus has one!)
But Twitter is just so dark right now and despite Elon’s claims to clean it up like his battery-powered Teslas, he seems intent on the opposite. This weekend was a cesspool of vitriol following the Proteas’ exit from the T20 World Cup, the Boks losing to Ireland and Man United falling to Aston Villa.
I needed an escape.
You can keep my blue tick Elon because TikTok is my new tik. It is highly addictive and I keep telling myself, ‘just one more content piece’, before looking up to find I’d been scrolling for two hours.
The funny thing is you wouldn’t find my account even if you went deep diving. I’m too shy to post too. I don’t follow anyone and no one follows me. But my ‘For You Page’ on TikTok is a treasure chest of wonder and amazement.
Over the last few hours, I’ve watched a guy fashion an underground dwelling with just a knife and a panga because he went camping in the woods without a tent. He built a stone stove with rocks and mud and cooked himself the perfect steak with condiments.
Then there are the chefs preparing the most delicious meals right there in their kitchens. Guys pulling off crazy football or parkour skills. Reams of DIY content. And a motoring enthusiast who has made a content business out of his hobby of picking up discarded Ferraris that have seen better days and restoring them.
The content is beautifully shot and edited and for the most part produced by amateurs on their smartphones. I just can’t get enough of the TikTok goodness.
While Twitter has been my go-to for news (since I’m a news junkie), it has been a rather nasty place for a long time. Now it is set to its edge because Elon is a typical rich kid who bought a thing, interfering with a platform that was ranked top of the social media food chain. He sounds like a used car salesman selling dodgy cars. Or seats to Mars… oh wait!
TikTok is teaching me a thing or three about videography too. And how to braai a pizza. Embarrassingly, I bought a nifty little cast iron pizza braai oven some time back and recently discovered on TikTok I had been doing it all wrong. Put the hot coals on the top of the oven lid not below, you dunce, Gasant!
Of course, there is beef between TikTok influencers. But it’s very funny and rather entertaining. Nothing like the nastiness of Twitter Twars. They call themselves creators and they get invited to be MCs, and become brand ambassadors and their followings make them social media immortals.
Right now, there are two Cape Flats guys beefing about who does charity better. You can’t make it up. So, a guy who collected some goodies for babies at an orphanage challenged his TikTok nemesis to match his very public donation. The rival ended up challenging the antics of the public do-gooder – who he called out for doing it for clout – to a charity boxing match. They then do lives with their armies of followers dissing each other. It’s great!
But one of the standout accounts is a local guy who posts about incorrect song lyrics. He’ll be busting some pretty cool moves while listening to a tune on his headphone. Someone will ask him what he is listening to and the response is always hilarious.
Picture the scene:
Wife: “Babe what are you listening to?”
Jon Dreyer: “Hol hare!”
Wife: “What?!”
Jon Dreyer: “Hol hare, man!”
Cue the music. He is listening to Volaré by the Gipsy Kings!
I love it here. And everyone is invited. But let me go. TikTok is calling my name and I’m wasting valuable time telling you about it. Please never change, TikTok.
And Elon: hands off!
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Picture: Pexels