Guys, we have led for centuries and just look at the mess our world is in. It is time for men to step aside and change and for women to take the lead, argues Gasant Abarder in his new #SliceofGasant.
Abarder, who recently launched his book, Hack with a Grenade, is among the country’s most influential media voices. Catch his weekly column here, exclusive to Cape {town} Etc.
WARNING: If you have a fragile, male ego, it’s best you stop reading this now. What you’re about to read will draw out all the mediocre, privileged men who can’t recognise their blind spots when it comes to women.
Right, so with that out of the way, let me tell you about the Abarder household.
I’ve only recently started collecting tools and so I can at least drill a hole to hang a picture. I can paint and do manual labour. But make no mistake: Mrs Laylaa Abarder is the brains. A simple chair that comes flat-boxed with instructions and even the necessary tools to assemble will keep me cross-eyed for hours. I don’t look at instructions.
Laylaa will study the instructions and then show my neanderthal self how to put it together. She will design the kitchen refurbishment and brief the contractor while I stand there – not even looking pretty. She has also schooled me on how to paint a nursery wall in horizontal two colour stripes with a simple chalk line tool.
She is my satnav when I refuse to ask for or look up directions. She also runs the finances because I can’t stick to a household budget.
It got me thinking: what if women ruled the world?
Reuters last week reported that Spain had a cabinet overhaul that featured not only younger ministers, but many of them women. Very progressive and much needed for diversity. Will the women deliver?
Based on the track records of the women professionals I know, my prediction is a resounding yes!
Think about the world wars and heinous violent crimes, gender-based violence and general toxic male behaviour, like road rage. The perpetrators are overwhelmingly men. Don’t even get me started on online bullying.
Look, of course there are exceptions.
Trailblazer she may have been, but Maggie Thatcher, for example, wouldn’t back sanctions against apartheid South Africa. But in almost every area of life, women are breaking the glass ceiling without having to raise a fist (or their voices) or take up arms.
In sport, Thembi Kgatlana, the Banyana Banyana ace, recently signed for Atletico Madrid. Our Bok women’s captain – the first in Africa to sign a pro deal with a rugby franchise abroad – has a law degree. My favourite sports broadcasters are all women: Cato Louw on radio, Julia Stuart as a TV football anchor and Kass Naidoo on cricket commentary. This dynamic trio knows their stuff and it shows just how much more research into their respective codes they do before going on air.
In Science, Technology, Engineering and Mathematics, Professor Mmaki Jantjies, is Telkom’s Head of Innovation. She was part of a team that successfully launch an augmented and virtual reality postgrad diploma at a university. She collaborated with two other women, an isiXhosa specialist Dr Sebolelo Mokapela and science researcher Professor Fanelwa Ajayi to introduce an augmented reality cube that translates Chemistry’s Periodic Table into isiXhosa with a smartphone app for mother tongue instruction.
Celebrating the achievements, strength and determination of women at UWC. Dr Mmaki Jantjies, EMS Dean Professor Michelle Esau and Professor Cherrel Africa ahead of the special EMS faculty lunch for invited staff and students. @MmakiJ @CherrelAfrica pic.twitter.com/3MKCcAJdsU
— UWC (@UWConline) August 2, 2019
In New Zealand, Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern is servant leadership personified.
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On her watch, her country was COVID free in no time. Months before, she was successfully able to quell religious tensions. She rallied an entire nation after a fatal mosque shooting that could have had a disastrous fallout – all without resorting to violence. New Zealand has a very different culture of tolerance and respect to that of their neighbours Down Under, where the impressive Maori way of life sets the tone for nation building.
But here is the rub: women in 2021 still have to do the most to earn the recognition and rewards they rightfully deserve in a world where mediocre men still set the agenda.
The men who sit on the board of world athletics decide on the gender of Caster Semenya and an EU court rules that young Muslim girls wearing hijab to school will be banned because it supposedly creates conflict.
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This column is deliberately written in July because I don’t subscribe to only recognising women in Women’s Month. It’s patronising and artificial, along with just 16 days of activism against violence against women and children when such recognition and activism should happen every day.
Maybe my bias for women in leadership is influenced by the women in my life, like Mrs Aleweya Abarder, my dear mother and women bosses like Patricia Lawrence that I have had the privilege of working for and with.
In my experience, the emotional intelligence was just streaks ahead. Based on this bias, I would like to see a woman as the next president of South Africa – irrespective of their political party affiliations.
It is for this bias too that the hunter-gather and nurturer roles have changed in the Abarder household.
Laylaa supported all my dreams and ambitions for 15 years. I’ve achieved what I wanted to and now it’s her turn to shine after landing her dream job. I’ve taken a back seat as the supporting actor. How has that been going? Like a dream!
Women, it is your time to lead. And guys, don’t feel threatened. The world will be a better place for it.
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Picture: Beyoncé Instagram