There was a moment at the coronation of Argentina as World Cup winners in Qatar that summed up the premise of the entire tournament. The king draped Lionel Messi in a sheer, see-through garment – a version of the robes or abaya reserved for Qatari royalty writes Gasant Abarder.
Abarder, who recently launched his book, Hack with a Grenade, is among the country’s most influential media voices. Catch his weekly column here, exclusive to Cape {town} Etc.
It was a nice gift but the timing was awful and ill-conceived. The picture etched into folklore won’t be of the football goat (Greatest of All Time) holding the trophy aloft in his famous number 10 shirt that Maradona donned when he lifted the 1986 trophy. No, the goat looked like he was wearing a sexy nightgown.
It was a moment of ridiculousness that summed up Fifa’s insistence to give the tournament to Qatar – a nation with a horrible human rights track record. A moment of sheer indulgence on the part of the hosts and at the expense of their most illustrious guest at the finals.
For the football fan, it was an immense tournament. Upsets galore, more goals than any other instalment of the competition and drama upon drama in the final.
While Messi had new clothes, this December also saw the numbers of two goats, CR7 and CR22, coming up. One succumbed in the semi-finals in the battle for supremacy. The other chooses slow poison.
For Cristiano Ronaldo – known in footballing circles as CR7 – the debate of who is goat (greatest of all time) in football is well and truly over.
For Cyril Ramaphosa – known in political circles for at least four days as CR22 – the goat tag doesn’t represent anything significant other than he is an old fart.
For the former, it was a bridge too far. CR7 just couldn’t scale the highs of his earlier career exploits. He made little to no impact on Portugal’s ambitions. His greatest rival Messi rolled back the years and was instrumental in Argentina winning the world cup. Along the way, he picked up the Golden Ball player of the tournament prize.
The goat debate was settled. Messi had the world cup and did it on the grandest stage. All but CR7 knew it was over. His tell-all world exclusive interview with journalist Piers Morgan sketched a picture of a man who certainly believed he could still do it.
For the latter, CR22, it was a pantomime of smiling and dancing alongside his biggest rival Jacob Zuma. The ANC delegates had a choice between a tarnished Cyril and a tarnished Zweli Mkhize. Neither of the two ANC candidates are free of scandal.
It tells you all you need to know about the state of the party that was once almost a regal organisation in the care of one Nelson Rolihlahla Mandela. It also tells you the story of crime in our country: that those at the very top of our country’s leadership make headlines for alleged involvement in crimes of their own.
The setting of the four-day show of self-indulgence was a nation experiencing days filled with up to 11 hours of loadshedding. In the midst of it all the CEO of Eskom had resigned, signalling further trouble for the power utility. Surely, the test of the leader chosen at the ANC, who will eventually become our next president, would have been who could best solve the power crisis gripping our nation?
Imagine the ANC bigwigs had the selflessness to set the business of campaigning aside until the last day of their congress and devoted three of the days to finding a solution. Instead, they had the stones to ask the Joburg municipality to make the congress exempt from loadshedding. If that isn’t a slap in the face for us mere mortals then nothing is.
CR7 is defeated as the goat. Messi is the undisputed goat. CR22 is still a goat (the old fart kind) and the ANC’s top man.
The latter result is academic for us citizens because we are the losers despite CR22’s Renew 22 campaign (which rather sounds like a pharmaceutical product for flatulence). CR22’s triumph simply makes him an emperor with new clothes.
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Picture: @FIFAWorldCup / Twitter